"In the beginning, God was overstimulated."

Okay, before any of my Bible-believing friends decide to hang me up by my toenails for misquoting Genesis 1:1...please allow me to explain.

This was a quote from my second oldest son, Caleb. 

He was age 4.  My husband and I had only three children at the time.  Our oldest, Nathan, would have been age 5, Caleb 4, and our youngest, Eva, was a newborn.

We had recently began our homeschooling journey and the boys were learning to read a little by themselves.

Caleb was excited about reading from the beginning, and one day I spotted him on the couch "reading" his little blue New Testament Bible - the one somebody had given him as a baby gift.  He was reading it UPSIDE DOWN. I just loved that! :)

He was lying on his back, one little foot propped over his opposite knee, reading out loud - with quite a bit of conviction, if I might add.   And I heard him say, matter-of-factly,

"In the beginning, God was overstimulated." 

Huh??

He had been memorizing Genesis 1:1 - "In the beginning, GOD CREATED THE HEAVENS AND THE EARTH."

So where did the "overstimulated" part come from?? 

Well...it came from ME! 

You see, my world seemed pretty topsy-turvy with the arrival of our 3rd child. (not that it didn't already seem topsy-turvy...just more so!)  I was crazy nervous about my first year of homeschooling.   And I was taking care of a new baby girl after having been on full bed rest for 7 weeks leading up to her arrival.  We had moved to a new town barely over a year earlier.  I didn't know a lot of people well - and was feeling pretty alone and overwhelmed a lot of the time. 

Add in some serious extended family drama...plus the struggle with a MAJOR family decision...and I often found myself exasperated with life. 

My little boys seemed to have testosterone blazing through their veins causing them to act like little wild indians most of the time.  I'd look at my little boys and say (sometimes loudly...okay, so I would SCREAM!) "Ughhh!  I'm so overstimulated!!"

Which meant "please leave Mommy alone for just a LITTLE bit"..."stop bouncing off the walls, stop patting me on the leg, stop asking for something to drink, stop whining..."

You get the picture... 

At moments like that, I'd put my baby girl in a safe place, sit my boys on the couch...and dare them to move. 

And, I'd go the bathroom for a good cry - and a few moments of solitude.  I'd complain to God about how I just can't do this.  I'd tell Him that He must've gotten all mixed up when he chose me for this lot in life - because I was REALLY rotten at it!  I was sure I was ruining my kids for life by screaming and being grumpy.  What kind of example is that??

God would listen to my heart.  He'd hear my complaints, my whining, my weariness...

...my desire to be who He wanted me to be. 

And, then... He would seem to whisper to me and tell me it was going to be okay. 

When I'd say, "I just can't do this, God!  I'm terrible at it!"  He'd whisper to my heart..."You're right.  YOU can't do this.  But I CAN.  You ARE terrible at this.  So, let ME TEACH YOU, my daughter."

So, I'd wipe my face and blow my nose, and make my way out of the bathroom.  And, although I wasn't sure how, I was certain that God could help make me into the wife/mother He called me to be.  

Because deep down, I really loved being a mother.  When all my friends in elementary school were playing the "MASH" game to see if they could marry the perfect boy, live in a mansion, and have 2 kids, of course I always wanted the perfect boy - but I didn't mind the shack and lots of kids.  :)  (After all, the perfect boy makes any house a home, and he would love children as much as I love them, right?) 

I always knew I wanted to be a wife and a mommy. 

So, here I was...God helping me see that my little independent self needed HIM more than ever. 

I thank God for lessons learned...and for still helping me when I am overstimulated!

And, one more thing...I'm so glad God doesn't ever really get OVERSTIMULATED!  He can handle it ALL. 

EVERY.  SINGLE.  PART... of our lives.