Things I never imagined hearing myself say...

Before I was married with children, I never IMAGINED that I'd find myself actually saying some of the things that come out of my mouth.

Like...


"I'm trying to use the bathroom in peace...okay, bring me the book and I'll read it to you."


"Please, get your fork out of your diaper, and EAT."


"Put the banana back in the kitchen, and THEN you can go to the potty."


"Do boogers really taste that good??"


"No, Mommy really doesn't feel like eating your soggy leftovers today, but I hate to see good food waste."


"Just don't pee on the van!"


"Honey, why is it that little boys CAN NOT aim and hit a toilet with that size hole?"


"Don't put ketchup up your nose."


"Wow, a magnet sucked that other magnet right out of his nose.  Whew!"


"Doctor __________, I have no idea when or how that tiny bit of blue crayon got stuck in his nose."


"Get out of that tree...and bring your bucket, your bb gun, and your coconut pie with you."


"Yes, you can sleep with me and Daddy tonight - even though you will kick us continually and take up three-fourths of the bed...I love you, too."


"You dug a hole 15 foot deep in the backyard??  What is Daddy going to say?!?!"


"No, you can NOT climb on top of the house."


"Am I missing one?"


"Who put ANOTHER bug in the freezer?"



I'm sure there must be countless crazy things I say every day, and I wish I would document them better.  I've written down some that the kids have said, but not many.  I could kick myself for not doing better! 


Maybe I'll grab that little notebook and put it on the counter TODAY!